Yesterday my husband and I attended a fundraiser yesterday for cancer research, hosted by a relative of mine, and to our dismay we were promptly attacked and judged by other guests. The subject of our impending move had come up, and we mentioned how we would soon be relocating into a house. This launched a barrage of questions, including who would be on the title of the house, how we had missed a specific one time tax break, etc. We were actually told that we had received “poor financial advice.” Really? Let’s look at the positives, shall we?
- Moving into a property which will accumulate value over the years, not lose it
- Switching rent money into money for a mortgage
- Paying less over time because the mortgage is FIXED, not variable
- Enjoying consistent parking, stability, and more SPACE
Granted, we’ll be sharing the space with two people close in age and lifestyle to us–people we’ve known for YEARS and trust. Yet somehow, utter strangers think they have the right to comment on our finances without even hearing the full picture. We weren’t given a chance to flesh out the whole plan.
In addition, I’ve found that snap judgements seem to be reserved for a specific age group. Having talked to various people around me about our plans to move, most in their 20s and 30s felt it was a sound decision. Even my close friend in her 50s seemed behind it. However, most others in their middle age seemed surprised by the decision or would subtly suggest that we were, shall I say, silly?
I have to wonder: why is the concept of working with others towards a common goal frowned upon? This whole process was initiated by generosity, and at its root, love. I recognize how fortunate we are to be able to move into this formerly foreclosed, multi bedroom home, and out of our extremely tiny one bedroom apartment. It may not even be a permanent situation, but one that suits all of us well for the next decade or so at least. I just wonder why snap judgements seem so permissible in society today. I am wondering: what would be the most appropriate response for such insults?